Dear Facebook Friends,

I love facebook, I do. I like to stalk all of you and find out what you're doing, where you've been, and what you're looking like these days. What I do not want to know, is your relationship drama, inspirational quotes that get you through your days, or how many cows you have on your farmville.

Facebook is for stalking, not buying shamrocks for St Paddys day.

I have two main beefs with facebook: status updates, and inappropriate pictures [especially between Nov 1-10 when the Hallowe'en albums come out]. I love logging on to 'the book in the morning and seeing these:

Laura McLaren is tired of your crap and one day you will wake up and realize you lost a diamond while you were collecting stones. Guess this diamond will be shining alone tonight =( =(

• Please. Airing your relationship drama through your status update makes me want to yarble.

Laura McLaren is going to work today, thank God I got the H1N1 vaccine...LOL

• Note: That happened two months ago. If you are still writing status updates about something that happened more than 2 weeks ago, maybe its time to throw in the towel.

and last but not least, my all time favourite

Laura McLaren lost ma phone o know! Plz txt me ur # 2 999-999-9999 n send meh ur diggies!

• 1. we speak English
• 2. we write in English
• 3. WHY ARE YOU GIVING OUT YOUR PHONE NUMBER ON FACEBOOK?

In all seriousness: I worry about some people on facebook. You never know who can get access to this stuff these days, and just because you have your profile set to "only friends" doesn't mean that some pretty scary people can't get your information. I see a lot of young girls (aka you teens in high school) with not only their cell number, but their home address listed in their profile. Add to it a profile full of model-posing profile pics and an 80 pic Hallowe'en album of you as a sexy donut maker, and voila. Just like words in an email, Facebook has no tone, and the message you are sending across to "just friends" is loud and clear. All I can say, is be careful.

This may come accross as very judgemental, but we are all judgemental to a degree, and I swear I have the urge to message at least one person a day to remind them that their employers, teachers, coaches, etc are all on facebook these days, and maybe seeing you hugging the porcelain God on that day you supposedly had pink eye isn't the best idea. Don't get me wrong, I love facebook photos - of your kids, your apartment, and your family; however, I don't need to see your breasts, your scabs, or your kissy face [ps, a whole 80 pic album dedicated to your dog isn't my style either... but you get the drift]. I love confident people who aren't afriad to be who they are; however, flaunting who you are and all you got to 1082 friends is a different story.

Why I felt compelled to write this post I'm not sure - maybe its because I watch too many episodes of Criminal Minds, Law & Order, and Cold Case. Maybe it's because I really care about a lot of the people on my friends list and wouldn't want anyone to get hurt or lose a job due to some unfortunate tagged photo's. Or maybe its because I just don't like your dog.

Either way, before you update your status or your photo's - please remember - facebook is for stalking, and it ain't only me surfing your profile.

Laura McLaren is finished another blog, making some tea, and logging off.

*On a separate, unrelated note - if you have any questions, blog requests, or research/advice you want me to give about specific products or fashion/beauty/skincare - feel free to email me at allmylaundry@gmail.com*